Wednesday, December 9, 2015

My Intro To TERRORS: REEL MONSTERS!

Here's a fun little treat: the introduction to my book Terrors: Reel Monsters - The Original Short Stories That Became 8 Classic Horror Films.  Enjoy!


I like monster movies. ...No, wait, that's not completely true. I love monster movies.

Aside from sweet memories of laying on the carpeted floor, a sanctuary of Creature Features and Saturday Afternoon Marathons from the dreaded hours of elementary school, these films have always spoken to me: the carefully constructed stories dovetailing with direction, nuances of acting, the beauty of a perfect screenplay...or even the ones with cruddy plots, sloppy cinematography, laughable performances, or horrible dialogue... there's always something, somewhere in both the best and the worst, that I've enjoyed.

Suffice it to say, I'm not a snob. Sure, I admire directors like Wim Wenders, Cronenberg, Kurosawa, Mamuro Oshii, and Frankenheimer, but I have a particular fondness for movies made in a hurry with a zero-dollar budget—yet still managing to create something truly memorable.

This book is a kind of celebration of those bootstrap classics of horror and science fiction: Stuart Gordon's playful gorefest, Re-Animator; Browning's shuddering nightmare, Freaks; Robert Florey's atmospheric The Beast with Five Fingers; even the playfully ridiculous Invasion of the Saucer Men; Robert Wise's steadily creepy The Body Snatcher; The Twilight Zone's “It's A Good Life,” and so many others. Take it from a true fan: get some popcorn, a soda, and settle in for a fantastic afternoon of amazingly creepy cinema—or at least the stories that inspired some of its biggest classics.

And if there's one thing I actually like more than the movies, it’s the stories behind the movies.

It's a sad fact that while a lot of people—who aren't cinema junkies—don’t know that the movies they know and love had their origins in some equally (if not more) incredible works of fiction. They don't realize that behind so many of their favorite—or just guilty—pleasures on film or TV, there isn't just a director and producer, actors and the crew, but an author whose novel or story was the true creative force behind it all.

Re-Animator? It came from the one and only H.P. Lovecraft's story of the same name. “One of us...one of us,” (of course I'm talking about Freaks) was taken from “Spurs” by Tod Robbins. The Beast with Five Fingers came from the same-titled story by W. F. Harvey. Invasion of the Saucer Men started as “The Cosmic Frame” by Paul Fairman. “Wish him into the cornfield,” (from, naturally, “It's a Good Life“) was originally from the famous Jerome Bixby story of the same name. Black Sabbath was from “The Curse of the Vourdalak” by Alexis Tolstoy; The Monkey's Paw came from a story by W. W. Jacobs, and The Body Snatcher came from Robert Louis Stevenson.

There are, of course, other authors whose work has been adapted into horror movies—but the stories in this anthology were picked because the ideas and stories behind these playful cinematic treats have nearly disappeared into obscurity. Lots of people, for instance, know the origins of Soylent Green (Make Room, Make Room by Harry Harrison or 2001: A Space Odyssey (The Sentinel by Arthur C. Clarke); Blade Runner (Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? by Philip K. Dick), but very few know the origins of the films listed on our Table of Contents...even if their authors are extremely well known. Aleksey Tolstoy, Robert Louis Stevenson, Lovecraft anyone?

Fame aside, these writers deserve some recognition not just for the works that have been turned into silver screen horror classics, but for all the other great novels and short stories they created. Consider this, then, not just a celebration of the stories herein, but a gateway to the wider world of these authors’ literary creations.

Take Jerome Bixby (1923–1998) to start. It's truly tragic that far too few people know of Bixby's work and wide-ranging contributions to science fiction. Putting aside some of his more famous short stories—like “It's a Wonderful Life,” featured here—he also wrote the story that became the 1970's SF classic Fantastic Voyage as well as the screenplays for some of the most well-received, and fan-favorite, Star Trek episodes: “By Any Other Name,” “Day of the Dove,” “Requiem for Methuselah” and “Mirror, Mirror.” By the way, Digital Parchment Services recently released the definitive Jerome Bixby collection, Mirror Mirror: Classic SF by the Famed Star Trek and Fantastic Voyage Writer.

Paul W. Fairman (1916–1977) is similarly a tremendously respected author and editor of 14 novels and some dozens of short stories. Fairman wrote under quite a few pseudonyms, establishing himself as a well-respected author of both science fiction and detective tales. Like Bixby, he also saw his work being adapted many times for both the big and the small screens: “People are Alike All Over” (Twilight Zone) came from his story “Brothers Beyond the Void” and—of course—his tale “The Cosmic Frame” became Invasion of the Saucer Men (and later, painfully, remade as The Eye Creatures).

Tod Robbins (1888–1949) is the author of seven novels, including The Unholy Three, The Master of Murders, Close Their Eyes Tenderly and the sadly unreleased To Hell and Home Again. Robbins is viewed by many as a master of the truly strange tale. After remaining in France during the Second World War he served time in a concentration camp—passing away a few years after the war had ended.

William Fryer Harvey (W.F. Harvey, 1885–1937) was another brilliant short story author, penning The Beast with Five Fingers as well as 15 separate volumes' worth of other work. In the First World War, Harvey was awarded the Albert Medal for Lifesaving, though the injuries he sustained during the rescue affected him for the rest of his life.

William Wymark Jacobs (W. W. Jacobs, 1863–1943) is one of those authors whose work has become a true landmark. “The Monkey's Paw” (which has been adapted numerous times) first appeared in his collection, The Lady of the Barge (1902). Jacobs was also the author of many other very well received short stories, though most of them were much less...terrifying, and in a much lighter and more humorous tone.

Aleksey Konstantinovich Tolstoy (1817–1875), aside from being Leo Tolstoy's second cousin, is a literary genius in his own right, having written the classics The Death of Ivan the Terrible, Don Juan, Tsar Boris, and—of course—“The Curse of the Vourdalak” (which first appeared in 1839).

As for H.P. Lovecraft and Robert Louis Stevenson ... come on, who doesn’t know about them? But then this is, after all, a book celebrating the stories that became films, so maybe a little introduction is due, for those who were totally napping during English Lit.

H.P. Lovecraft (1890–1937) is still, years after his passing, the master of unnamable dread and madness. Hell, even the word “Lovecraftian” has entered our vocabulary. His books and stories—many featuring his nightmarish cosmic entities such as Cthulhu—have been turned into to film, TV shows, video games, and even plush toys. His tale, “Herbert West—Reanimator,” first appeared in Weird Tales in 1922. The film adaption, directed by Stuart Gordon (1985), and starring the delightful Jeffrey Combs, has become a modern horror classic.

Robert Louis Stevenson (1850–1894) is, of course, is a pure and absolute legend. The author of classics such as Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, Treasure Island (both staples of film and stage adaption), Kidnapped, and The Wrong Box—and many others. Stevenson had the fortune of being a celebrity author during his lifetime and, according to the Index Translationum (UNESCO's authority of book translations), is the 26th most translated author in the world.

There they are—at least in capsule form. But I hope these brief biographical sketches serve as an introduction to a group of authors whose terrifying work was transformed into amazing pieces of film and television history.

So, absolutely, make some popcorn—and be sure and put lots of butter and salt on it—get some soda, make up a pillow fort, and settle in to read the stories behind the great monster movies. Notice which parts of the original story were kept, which weren’t, what worked better on the printed page and what was more fun on the big or small screen.

And the next time you watch a horror flick, remember that behind those reel monsters there may very well lurk even more terrifying creatures: the original beasts, ghouls and eldritch beings from the stories at the heart of each film.

—M.Christian

Monday, October 12, 2015

A DARK DOINGS AT MISKATONIC U Special: Made In DNA

Continuing the celebration of the release of Dark Doings at Miskatonic U (that I had the extreme honor of editing) here's a quickie interview with the author of one of the new Miskatonic tales in the book - the wonderful Made In DNA:


Q: What's your favorite part of the Lovecraft mythos

The creeping darkness the work introduces into your soul. There isn't any particular "monster" in the series I really dig as they all create this overwhelming sense of foreboding. It's the whole package.

Q: What do you think is the lasting "allure" of Lovecraft's work?

Though steeped in monster culture, the work never stops playing with your mind. It's the moonlit shadows and the inexplicable noises that lurk around the other side of a door or turn of a hallway.

Q: What's the scariest thing, for you, in Lovecraft's work?


The monsters.

Q: What's your area of study at Miskatonic University?

Sex Magicks.

Monday, September 14, 2015

A DARK DOINGS AT MISKATONIC U Special: Jason Rubis

As part of a celebration of the release of Dark Doings at Miskatonic U (that I had the extreme honor of editing) here's a quickie interview with the author of one of the new Miskatonic tales in the book - the fabulous Jason Rubis:


Q: What's your favorite part of the Lovecraft mythos

The monsters! No writer ever created such memorably "indescribable" abominations! The nightgaunts, the shoggoths, Great Cthulhu himself ... they all feel as real as sharks or tigers, and twice as menacing!

Q: What do you think is the lasting "allure" of Lovecraft's work?

The man was simply a great storyteller. You can talk about existentialism and the insignificance of man against the unfeeling cosmos and such, but Lovecraft's fiction has that strange note of conviction you see in all great fantasists (and not a few other genres as well). When you start reading a really great HPL story like "Whisperer in Darkness" (one of my personal favorites), there's that oddly comforting feeling, of sitting down to hear a story, told by someone who knows what they're talking about. You imagine this someone--a very tall, gaunt someone from Rhode Island, let's say--sitting down with you, looking you in the eye and saying: "Listen ... there were these terrible floods in Vermont, way in the back country, and they found some bodies in the river afterward ... very *strange* bodies..." That may not be what initially brings people to Lovecraft, but it's the reason they keep reading him and remember him as one of the greats.

Q: What's the scariest thing, for you, in Lovecraft's work?

The way his stories--the later stories, in particular--are told as a series of hints and allusions, through invented bits of lore, newspaper clippings, journal entries, etc. You only see what's happening very obliquely, but there's a sense of some awful truth slowly coming into focus. And then suddenly--WHAM! It all comes together. Even today, after having read and re-read the stories many times, it works for me.

Q: Tell us a bit about how you came to write your story for DARK DOINGS AT MISKATONIC U?

Like the hero of "Signed First Edition," I spent way too many hours of my freshman year digging through the stacks at my university library. I found one very odd book full of very graphic pictures of people being tortured by people in skull masks and like that. Today my guess is that it was about Grand Guignol or European exploitation films, but the text was in French, so I had no idea at the time what the hell this thing was about, which made it even more disturbing. I carried that book around in my head for a long time, and when the opportunity came to submit to DARK DOINGS I knew exactly what I wanted to do with it.

Q: What's your area of study at Miskatonic University?

I'm currently "virtually auditing" several classes in cryptoarchaeology at the Misk. I do hold a master's in Unspeakable Blasphemies from the Eldritch Studies department, but it's not on my resume. ;)

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Out Now: Reel Monsters: Eight World Famous Stories That Inspired Legendary Horror Films

This is a blast!  Check out this brand new book: Reel Monsters: Eight World Famous Stories That Inspired Legendary Horror Films.

Featuring fantastic stories that became some truly amazing films ... a fun read for film buffs as well as fans of classic horror tales!


Eight world famous stories that inspired legendary horror films. With filmographies and new Introduction!

Includes: the original stories for Freaks (Spurs), It's A Good Life, The Beast With Five Fingers, Invasion Of The Saucer Men (The Cosmic Frame), The Body Snatchers, The Monkey's Paw, and more.

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Out Now: Dark Doings at Miskatonic U!


Here's a real treat! We all love HP Lovecraft stories ... well, here's a book (edited by Jean Marie Stine and myself) featuring all of his special Miskatonic University stories plus brand new, never-before-seen works by some kick-ass writers also starring Lovecraft's famed (or infamous) college.

12 Chilling New and Classic Tales of that Haunted University's Ill-fated Students and Faculty

Just check out this nightmarish table of contents:

PART I: THE GOLDEN AGE – The Early 20TH Century
HERBERT WEST: REANIMATOR
H. P. Lovecraft

THE DUNWICH HORROR
H. P. Lovecraft

THE WHISPERER IN DARKNESS
H. P. Lovecraft

THE DREAMS IN THE WITCH HOUSE
H. P. Lovecraft

AT THE MOUNTAINS OF MADNESS
SHADOW OUT OF TIME

PART II: NEW HORRORS – The Early 21ST Century

RED SKY AT MORNING
Made in DNA

SO, WE NEVER LEAVE
Ralph Greco

SHALLOW FATHOMS
M. Christian

TOUCH
Lukas Scott

ELSAUS APP
Patrick Whitehurst

SIGNED FIRST EDITION
Jason Rubis

Thursday, July 2, 2015

Medieval Suits of Armor - Dark Roasted Blend And Me


Very cool: the great Avi Abrams of Dark Roasted Blend just reposted one of my favorite pieces ... and be sure to check out my collection of fun history, weird art, and more: Welcome To Weirdsville!

http://amzn.com/B007TXXMC4

Metal Body Suits vs. Weapons of Medieval Destruction
Back in the good old days -- which everyone pretty much agrees were pretty damned rotten -- what you wore was a matter of life and death: simple rotting cloth was common, leather was rare, but for the gentleman of standing, it was armor or nothing.
The first appearance of armor is a matter of much debate. Some say forged metal is key, in which case the toga-wearing crowd would be the first. Others insist that even wood worn as protection could count, in which case you'd have to go as far back as the sticks and stones brigade. But most everyone agrees that back in those rotten times, when men were knights and women were damsels in distress, armor was at its height. 
[MORE]

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Read The Story That Inspired The Horror Classic FREAKS - In Reel Monsters, Out Now!


Freaks is a film that still gives goosebumps - and here's an opportunity to read the incredible story that inspired it ... it's in the book that the great folks at PageTurner Editions/Renaissance E Books just released (and edited by myself):

#

Reel Monsters: Eight World Famous Stories That Inspired Legendary Horror Films features fantastic stories that became some truly amazing films ... a fun read for film buffs as well as fans of classic horror tales!



Eight world famous stories that inspired legendary horror films. With filmographies and new Introduction!

Includes: the original stories for Freaks (Spurs), It's A Good Life, The Beast With Five Fingers, Invasion Of The Saucer Men (The Cosmic Frame), The Body Snatchers, The Monkey's Paw, and more.

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Welcome To Weirdsville Celebration

As part of my wonderful Welcome To Weirdsville sale, here's a fan-favorite piece from the book.  Enjoy!


http://amzn.com/B007TXXMC4

So far you lucky readers -- if that’s really what you are -- have been treated to lost nuclear hardware, misplaced biological weapons, an18th century spiritualist and his clockwork ‘God,’ and recently, creatures great and small (mostly small) that can kill you faster than you can read this sentence -- even if you’re a slow reader.

But there’s an even more terrifying, creepy, freaky, disturbing subject we haven’t talked about yet: one that can make even the heartiest, stone-stomached of you clutch your tail-wagging doggies and purring kitties while rocking back and forth mumbling “nature is good, nature is good, nature is good …”

As you’ll soon read, however, even your loving pets can save you from the nightmare that is, more than likely, with you already.

Or, to be precise, living inside you already: parasites.

YouTube has far too many clips of botflies, tapeworms, or pinworms in all their disgusting glory: squirming and writhing from puss-glistening holes in their victims, squirming in the bellies of those unfortunate enough to have become part of their life cycle. But that’s not the worst.

We like to think we’re the masters of our destiny, that “I think I shall do (fill in the blank)” comes only from our minds and wills. But in some cases that’s just not true -- or, perhaps, that’s what the creature living inside me is telling me to say.

Welcome to the wonderful world of not just parasites, but parasites that directly influence or flat-out control their hosts.

Beginning big or at least not microscopic, the emerald cockroach wasp has a very unique, and rather frightening, method of supplying its pupal young with a meal. Like some other insects, the wasp feeds its young living prey: paralyzing the snack and then laying an egg on its still-living body. But the emerald isn’t a very big bug, unlike the monstrous tarantula wasp, so it can’t drag its prey back to its burrow. Instead, the emerald performs a type of on-the-go brain surgery, carefully stinging a roach in a few selected parts of its brain, disabling its escape reflex. The wasp then chews off the roach’s antenna, effectively blinding it. Hijacking the roach’s remaining stub of an antenna, it then leads the still-living and -- if roaches have a form of consciousness -- aware bug back to its burrow where it will be a still-living dinner for its offspring.

Yes, you may shudder. But it gets worse.

You’re just lucky you’re not a snail, especially one that happens to become part of a leucochloridium paradoxum ’s elaborate lifecycle. Beginning as eggs in bird droppings, leucochloridium enters the snail’s body and then proceeds into its digestive tract. After a bit of time there, it develops into a larva – and then things get interesting.

How, you might ask, does leucochloridium go from snails to birds? Well, we know how -- but you might not want to know the answer.

What leucochloridium does is make its way from the snail’s gut to one of its eyestalks. There it causes the stalk to become red and inflamed. But that’s not all. The parasite also distorts the snail’s light perception so that it doesn’t hide from light anymore. So, out in the broad daylight, one eyestalk brightly colored, it becomes a something very much like a grub or caterpillar -- which birds love to eat. So the whole cycle begins again.

Then there’s sacculina, a type of barnacle. It loves crabs, but not in a healthy kind of way. What sacculina does, while in the barnacle’s larval phase, is find a nice, juicy crab and land on it. Then it walks around the unlucky crustacean until it finds an unarmored joint, and injects itself into the crab’s tasty meat. But sacculina doesn’t eat the crab. Oh, no – it’s not as simple as that. After a time in the crab’s body, the barnacle reproduces and reproduces and reproduces some more until it emerges as something a lot like a female’s egg sac.

That’s important, because it’s not just the female crab this happens to. If you should happen to be a male crab then transvestitism is in your future. Sacculina messes with the hormones in the male crab, making it basically a female -- especially appealing to other male crabs. It even goes as far as adjust the male’s behavior so it actually begins to act like a female crab, all to attract a male crab that may or may not have other sacculina parasites to fertilize and keep the cycle going. Once sacculina has you, if you’re a crab that is, then you belong to it. Sterilized, you become nothing but a mother to its eggs. Until you die.

We’re not finished yet -- far from it. Just be lucky you’re not a grasshopper or a cricket. Spinochordodes tellinii (the hairworm) larva finds its way into an unlucky hoppity by being eaten. Once in the bug it grows -- but don’t think the worm just gets bigger. It gets so big that when the adult worm comes out of the cricket it can be four times longer than the bug. It’s how it comes out that’s going to give you the shivers. When it simply has had enough of the bug, having pretty much eaten all of it from the inside, the worm takes possession of the insect’s brain, causing it to single-mindedly hunt out water. When it does, the bug jumps in -- and that’s when the worm erupts out of the host and swims away.

Okay, so it’s not fun to be a snail, or a crab, or a cricket. But what about poor homo sapiens? Please don’t tell me you think we don’t have our own, completely unwelcome passengers. I’ve already mentioned botflies, pinworms and tapeworms. But they are just freeloaders. They aren’t driving the bus that is us like these other manipulative parasites do.

Hold that puppy close, cuddle that kitten -- but maybe not that close. Ever heard of toxoplasma gondii? No? Well you might have but it’s certainly heard of you. In fact I’ll bet dollars to donuts that it’s paying a lot of attention to these words right now. Feel like doing something else? Anything else but reading this?

Maybe that isn’t you. Maybe it’s toxoplasma gondii.

I love kitties. But after reading about toxoplasma gondii I think I’m going to become a dog person. Primarily a cat parasite, gondii’s a protozoa that enters the feline system when the animal eats an infected animal. Once in the system, the protozoa can then reproduce asexually, making life pretty damned easy for itself.

But not for its hosts. Although the protozoa is mostly a cat fancier, it also can infect rats and mice. When it does, it does something rather creepy: it directly screws with the infected animal’s brain, taking out Mickey’s fear of cats. Think about that for a second: not open spaces, not water, not something big and general. Gondii only takes out a mouse’s fear of cats -- making sure it’ll get eaten by one, its host of preference.

Like I said, I really like kitties. But is that really ‘me’ who likes cats? Rats and mice and other warm-blooded creatures can carry gondii. You and I and every other homo sapien are also warm-blooded. I think you see where this is going.

Here’s a number for you: 25%. That’s a rather benign amount until you think of 25% of humans. Especially when I add that it’s been theorized that 25% of human beings may be infected by gondii – a parasite that affects the behavior of its hosts.

Some researchers have suggested that men who have gondii in their systems have lower IQs, are more prone to ‘novelty seek,’ and more masculine. Weirdly, infected women come out with higher IQs.

Then there’s reproduction. Not only do some think gondii changes what we are personality-wise, but its also been suggested that women who are infected have a tendency to give birth to more sons -- and males are more likely to spread the infection.

We’ve lost nuclear weapons, contaminated whole islands with biological devices, created mechanical Gods, and have been killed by very small critters with very nasty venoms. But when you think about parasites, especially certain kinds of parasites, the question then becomes:

Who are ‘we’? And who are you?

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

M.Christian Reads His Science Fiction Story "Some Assembly Required" from LOVE WITHOUT GUN CONTROL

(from M.Christian's Technorotica)

It might be a tad rough around-the-edges but here's my first - and rather fun, if I do say so myself, reading "Some Assembly Required" from my collection of science fiction, fantasy, and horror stories Love Without Gun Control (out in ebook and a special paper edition) from the great Renaissance E Books/PageTurner Editions:

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Amazingly Enough: Lost And Found – The Town That Doesn’t Exist

Check it out: a brand new Amazingly Enough: Lost And Found column just went live at Amazing Stories ... about a town that may, nor may not, exist!



Amazingly Enough: 
Lost And Found – The Town That Doesn’t Exist


Our battle against the forces of the Illuminati must never cease! Their hands … er, ‘claws’ are everywhere: politics, entertainment, science, soft drinks, there’s nothing they won’t corrupt for their own nefarious ends.
For example, one of their branches – a despicable agency revealed, at no doubt great personal cost to those seeking to expose the TRUTH, as T.H.E.M. – was fairly recently been exposed as having perpetrated a nightmarish deception that has shaken the very fabric of humanity.
Especially for those in Germany.
Thankfully, this horrible illusion has been revealed, the shadowy curtain pulled aside, and we now have a glimpse at the true horror that T.H.E.M. has commit to.
The daring of those who have made this brave discovery is only eclipsed by their genius: beginning with a post made to the German newsgroup de.talk.bizarre on May 16, 1994, the covert forces for TRUTH began to assemble the pieces that would prove the scope of this hideous deception.
What makes the discovery of this deception so ingenuous is the simplicity of the tools used to expose it. Achim Held, one of the key investigators, began by merely asking a few basic questions about the so-called city of Bielefeld:
1. Do you know anybody from Bielefeld?
2. Have you ever been to Bielefeld?
3. Do you know anybody who has ever been to Bielefeld?
With a shuddering revelation, these intrepid battlers against the forces of darkness came to the conclusion that the answers to these three straightforward queries were no: not a single person they knew was from Bielefeld, no one had ever been to Bielefeld, and – the most chilling revelation of all – that they also weren’t aware of anyone, ever, who had been to this supposed town!
Word of their discovery spread like wildfire: soon the nascent internet was lit up with the exposure of this dark secret. Oh, sure, the authorities attempted to keep the deception intact but their motivation was transparent; no matter what ‘expert’ on, or ‘resident’ of, Bielefeld they trotted out they were obviously either agents of the Illuminati themselves or in their employ.
Even more damning is the fact that there is a common German phrase, the root of which points another damming finger at the illusion that is Bielefeld: Am Arsch der Welt in Bielefeld means, basically, “at the end of the world in Bielefeld” evidence that there was – almost unconsciously – a feeling for quite a long time that the town of Bielefeld was nothing but an illusion.
Still further verification of the Bielefeld deception came from one of the illuminati’s own political puppets! Though there was a massive campaign to dismiss this revealing slip as a ‘joke’ it is damming proof of this massive ruse. In November, 2012, the German Chancellor Angela Merkel claimed that she had actually visited the place but then added, with a sinister and chilling laugh, “…if it exists at all.”
Finally, out of pure – and completely transparent – desperation, these forces of fiendish manipulation resorted to what they, no doubt, thought of as a clever means of reinforce the illusion of ‘Bielefeld’.
But, thankfully for free minds everywhere, this attempt was thwarted by two clear indicators of illuminati’s arrogance: the first was in their assumption that the medium of their message was one that would carry weight – when it was one that had long ago been exposed as a final resort of the desperate and the deceptive: the press release.
In 1999, this document was released – supposedly by the ‘City Council’ of the ‘town’ of ‘Bielefeld’ – to many of the conspiracy’s ‘official’ ‘channels’. Headlined Bielefeld gibt es doch! this pathetic attempt to bolster the myth of the town that doesn’t exist was received – naturally – as ‘truth’ by the puppets of the Illuminati while “Bielefeld does exist” was viewed by dedicated opponents of these cruel reptilian would-be overlords as further evidence of their desperation in preserving this facet of their mind-controlling operations.
But the second flaw in this attempt by the Illuminati to defeat the forces of truth and liberty was one that brought much needed mirth as well as uplifting satisfaction at the failure of these nightmarish manipulators.
For, in their false superiority, they had revealed themselves not just in the medium their message was delivered in but the very date it was transmitted: April 1st!
While the deception that is Bielefeld has become pretty much common knowledge, seen by the forces of freedom and decency as overwhelming evidence not just of the illuminati’s existence but – far better for those fighting for the liberation of humanity – that they can actually be exposed and brought to light, there persists an almost cruel humor around the illusion of Bielefeld: a mocking final act by these lurkers in the shadows.
Just last year, on the supposed 800th anniversary of the Town That Doesn’t Exist, the Illuminati made one final cruel attempt to ridicule those who had risked so much to bring out of the shadows the actions of this vile conspiracy.
Via all of their insidiously corrupt means of media manipulation, these despicable reptilian would-be overlords scorned the never-ending fight to preserve the precious freedom of thought and action by claiming the mythical town of Bielefeld’s anniversary celebration’s motto was Das gibt’s doch gar nicht.
Or, translated it into English: “This does not actually exist!”