Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Popular Tourist Destinations

No trip to Siberia would be complete without a visit to those charming local inhabitants, the Maritime Koryaks. Famed throughout the region for their fabulous meals of putrid tea and fresh (still bloody) venison, they are more even more famous for the wonderful hospitality they show strangers visiting their remote villages.

Approaching their remote domain via treacherous and rarely-policed trails, the casual tourist may occasionally pass a weary-appearing local official who will extend a happy, if exhausted, greeting before descending down towards the harsh and inhospitable lands of these charming people.

What the Maritime Koryaks lack in basic human hygiene and palatable dining, they more than make up for with their quaint, and very welcoming customs. Male travelers are especially advised to prepare themselves for the experience by stocking up on a supply of oysters or similarly blood-fortifying foods before attempting the journey.

You see, it is the attitude of the Maritime Koryak males that nothing is more honorable than to have their wives become...intimate with a stranger to their remote domains. So desirable is this custom, in fact, that it is not uncommon for the husbands of these charming peoples to follow any stranger to their village, pleading with them to partake of their wives. Before you think this an arrangement that only benefits their husbands, rest assured that for each spouse that begs for a strangers ministrations, he is echoed by the eager postures and demanding advances of their wives. Theirs, it is true, is a society that knows how to show a tourist a good time. If you should happen this way again, say in a year or so, be sure to stop by again–for if your partaking of this local custom has produced a happy baby boy then you will be rewarded with a feast and numerous fabulous gifts. And if you happened to produce a girl...well, you can always try again!

Alas, the intervention of outside culture has all but eliminated this practice, save for the most remote tribes. But for those truly interested in fully exploring the depths of a rare, and fascinating, culture, there are definitely rewards to be found in such a pursuit.

For those interested in a similar vacation, it is recommended that one travel to Babylon of prehistory. There, it is reported, female virgins are considered to be the worst of possible sexual, and marital, partners. To prove that a potential lover or mate has rid herself of this burden of purity, it is the common custom for ladies to become...intimate with as many strangers as possible. Since such liaisons would, of course, be difficult to prove, a custom has arisen where travelers throughout the region will give rings or other trinkets to the local maidens who earnestly demand their male attention–and thus prove by their gifts their experience and desirability.

A modification of this practice was also common among the peoples of Tibet, where the ability of strangers was so limited that it became the practice of older women in the village to go out and help acquire partners for their sisters and daughters. Near such a village is was routine to see such women eagerly singing the sexual praises of their clientele or even forcibly dragging the periodically unwilling, or baffled, foreigner towards these very willing young women.

If you thinks this custom to be rare, keep in mind the tales told of many a traveler who managed to bed as many as twenty young maidens per village. It is a wonder, therefore, that the casual traveler even possessed the stamina to complete any form of journey.

For the female traveler, these destinations may certainly appear to be unappealing–but for an adventurous woman there can be had equally interesting adventures in other lands. For example, among the Nair of Kerela in Southern India, there occurs a practice that allows a woman to have as many lovers as she sees fit–while never once appearing unfaithful.

Becoming officially married in a close kin to a normal Hindu ceremony, the young lady in question then consummates the ritual by having her new husband leave after three days. Henceforth she is allowed to take as many men as she desires as temporary mates and husbands from dusk till dawn (for daylight she must spend alone). These relations are not binding, and can be broken by any casual participant as he or she sees fit.

The world, it has often been said, is a wondrous place, full of mysteries and delights. It is therefore with earnest enthusiasm that I encourage the man or woman who wishes to sample such to take to the open road–and have ones eyes, and frequently legs, opened to new experiences.

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